With Child-like Faith

So today and yesterday were both days of catching up from the emotional drain of the previous couple of weeks. I have been spending most of my time around the orphanage waiting for the kids' school day to be finished. Today I went with three of the people who help run
this orphanage to visit another orphanage that was up in the mountains. It was about a three hour drive each way but had some of the most gorgeous views I've seen yet. It absolutely amazes me that throughout this journey I have seen some of the most awe inspiring pieces of countryside coupled with the most heartwrenching scenes and living conditions. It certainly has been a lot to absorb...to say the least.

One of the things I have come to appreciate the most is the children's nightly prayer service. The first time I went I had children hanging all over me, all of which by the end of service had fallen asleep and were limp in my arms. It was pretty comical because I was trying desperately not to drop anyone or let anyone slip off the bench. I have since learned to limit myself to only a couple that I know I can handle. None-the-less it is one of my absolute favorite memories because you can tell that these children trust you without reserve. They often will check to make sure that you have your arm all the way around them and if it is not, you better believe they will grab hold of your hand and wrap it all the way around to their little bellies. It must contribute to the sense of security and desire to feel loved that we all so desperately want and need, even if we try to conceal it. Why is it that we so often feel the need to cover up this deep rooted desire? Is it because we are afraid to show weakness of any kind? Why do we think that we can handle so many things all on our own? These little ones have taught me so much through such simple means. We too should share in this child-like faith, trusting without reservations and
turning to Him without hesitation for that so sought after desire to be loved. If the children can do this why is it so difficult for us? Why does He have to continually remind us of such simple concepts? Tonight my prayer is simply stated in that all of us might return to the mindset of children when it comes to our relationship with our Heavenly Father, our refuge.

While I still am uncertain as to why God has me here now, I do know that He has been teaching me a lot along the way.

I wish I was a doctor who could heal all the injured people of Haiti. I wish I was an engineer who could rebuild and restructure Haiti
to prevent further catastrophies for the Haitian people. I wish I was a counselor so I could help heal all the brokenhearted and defeated people in Haiti...but I'm not. God has really been revealing a ton to me regarding this very subject. We of course all have our different talents and that whatever they might be they should be used to glorify Him. This whole trip I have struggled with this tremendously, feeling myself a bit defeated because I was not doing more... me behind my silly camera. I guess it has just taken me a while to realize the importance of that role too. As I have been working through the book of Romans this week, this verse really seemed applicable. "But indeed, O man, who are you to reply against God? Will the thing formed say to him who fomed it, 'Why have you made me like this?'"(Romans 9:20)


*Note: Top photo is of a little boy along the roadside on our way up the mountain this morning.